By: Dr. Donald E. Wetmore
At the beginning of each year so many of us commit to changes and worthy goals to be accomplished in the next twelve months only to be disappointed come next December 31 when we discover we are no closer to achieving those resolutions than we were on January 1.
The noble resolutions we made early on became unstuck. So I looked at this dilemma and created four useful suggestions to increase the probability that your New Year’s resolutions will stick this year.
1. Quantify it. Sometimes we are just too vague about what we want. Therefore, a resolution such as, “I want to lose weight this year” will probably fail. It is too vague. How much weight? Be specific. What would your ideal weight be, less what do you weigh now, is what you are going after. It is not enough to resolve that; “I want enough money in the bank this year”. Quantify. What specific amount would soothe your soul?
2. Set a deadline. Resolutions that are to be achieved “as soon as possible” wind up in the heap of “Someday I’ll”. Deadlines are commitments. Without a deadline as a self-imposed pressure point, getting started is easily postponed. You see, deadlines put us on the line and define when failure occurs.
Deadlines also help us to break the resolution down into little bite-sized pieces. For example, if your goal is to lose 25 pounds by June 30, that translates into approximately 4 pounds per month, one pound per week, or a daily reduction of caloric intake (or an increase in daily caloric burn) of just 500 calories per day. Now that’s manageable. 500 calories a day is easy to achieve. 25 pounds seems like a leap across the Grand Canyon.
Until we quantify our goal, set a deadline, then break it down to its daily requirements, the resolution will forever seem unattainable.
3. Change one or two things at a time. We generally do not like change in the first place. We seek the familiar and avoid the strange. The more change you put yourself through, the higher the probability your campaign will collapse.
Focus in on one or two of the more important resolutions you seek to accomplish this year. When you achieve one or the other, start on the next one. Don’t overwhelm yourself with too much change all at once.4. Be realistic. There’s just something about the start of a new year that gets us all wound up for changes in our lives, sometimes extraordinary and unrealistic changes. We become much like the child in the candy store whose eyes are bigger than his stomach.
Be realistic. You can only accomplish a certain amount within a period of time. Don’t saddle yourself with unrealistic resolutions that will only spell failure later on.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Daily Planning – By Dr. Donald E. Wetmore
A poet once said, "The most powerful time is when you are alone, thinking about what you are to do rather than the doing itself."
You've been reminded many times, "A stitch in time saves nine."
Daily Planning is the time you ought to set aside each evening to plan out and take control over the most precious resource at your command, the next twenty-four hours. Done correctly, Daily Planning is not an expense that will cost you time but an ïnvestment that will pay you back many times over the time invested.
Herë are four important steps to follow each day during your Daily Planning time.
1. Create a To Do list of everything you "have to" do and everything you "want to" do during the next day. If you want to manage it, you have to measure it first. Add action steps to take care of your commitments and responsibilities, but also include other action items to help you to balance your life more effectively and achieve more of your goals in each of your Seven Vital Areas: health, family, financial, intellectual,social, professional, and spiritual.
2. Review every item on your To Do list and ask yourself three questïons with regard to each of item:
a. "Is this the best use of my time?" If it is, plan to do it. If itisn't, try to figure out a way to delegate it.
b. "Is there a better or more efficient way of handling or completing this item?" For example, combining telephone calls and making them alltogether.
c. "Is there anything I can do in advance to prepare for this task?" Do you need supplies or information from another to get it done? Most of the time I cannot delegate my tasks, find a better way to do it, or do anything to better prepare for it, but I can always find a few ways to improve. Whatever those improvements are, add them to your To Do list as action items
3. Review any Appointments and Scheduled events you have planned for the next day and ask yourself the same three questïons you asked in step #2above. As you review each commitment, determine if it is the best use ofyour time. Maybe you are scheduled to attend a meeting that has little value to you. Try to get excused. See if there is a better way to handle each commitment. For example, instead of actually meeting with someone, are you able to fax, email, or call that person instead? Can you do anything to better prepare for it? If you have a doctor's appointment, are there questïons you can write down to ask the doctor. Whatever these improvements are, add them to your To Do list as actions items.
4. Prioritize your To Do list. Place the number "1" next to the most important item on your list. Place the number "2" next to the second most important item. Continue prioritizing the entire list. You nöw have a ToDo list of all the items you "have to" do, but more importantly, all the items you "want to" do, including action items to help you achieve your goals and better life balance, and make your appointments and scheduled events and To Do list items flow more smoothly.
The process of Daily Planning will save you more time in the long run than what you spend to do it and will increase your daily productivity each day.
You've been reminded many times, "A stitch in time saves nine."
Daily Planning is the time you ought to set aside each evening to plan out and take control over the most precious resource at your command, the next twenty-four hours. Done correctly, Daily Planning is not an expense that will cost you time but an ïnvestment that will pay you back many times over the time invested.
Herë are four important steps to follow each day during your Daily Planning time.
1. Create a To Do list of everything you "have to" do and everything you "want to" do during the next day. If you want to manage it, you have to measure it first. Add action steps to take care of your commitments and responsibilities, but also include other action items to help you to balance your life more effectively and achieve more of your goals in each of your Seven Vital Areas: health, family, financial, intellectual,social, professional, and spiritual.
2. Review every item on your To Do list and ask yourself three questïons with regard to each of item:
a. "Is this the best use of my time?" If it is, plan to do it. If itisn't, try to figure out a way to delegate it.
b. "Is there a better or more efficient way of handling or completing this item?" For example, combining telephone calls and making them alltogether.
c. "Is there anything I can do in advance to prepare for this task?" Do you need supplies or information from another to get it done? Most of the time I cannot delegate my tasks, find a better way to do it, or do anything to better prepare for it, but I can always find a few ways to improve. Whatever those improvements are, add them to your To Do list as action items
3. Review any Appointments and Scheduled events you have planned for the next day and ask yourself the same three questïons you asked in step #2above. As you review each commitment, determine if it is the best use ofyour time. Maybe you are scheduled to attend a meeting that has little value to you. Try to get excused. See if there is a better way to handle each commitment. For example, instead of actually meeting with someone, are you able to fax, email, or call that person instead? Can you do anything to better prepare for it? If you have a doctor's appointment, are there questïons you can write down to ask the doctor. Whatever these improvements are, add them to your To Do list as actions items.
4. Prioritize your To Do list. Place the number "1" next to the most important item on your list. Place the number "2" next to the second most important item. Continue prioritizing the entire list. You nöw have a ToDo list of all the items you "have to" do, but more importantly, all the items you "want to" do, including action items to help you achieve your goals and better life balance, and make your appointments and scheduled events and To Do list items flow more smoothly.
The process of Daily Planning will save you more time in the long run than what you spend to do it and will increase your daily productivity each day.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
The 5 Dots
(Excerpt from Mike Brescia's newsletter)
On the cover of this week's Sports Illustrated is Tom Brady, 2005's Sportsman of the Year.
What makes this article interesting to me is how they gave us a glimpse into the mind of the most süccessful player at the most difficult position in the last 20 years. You see, it's important to me to know how people become successfül at anything. I look for mental patterns that can be
translated into any other area of life.
To know how Tom got so good so young, so mentally tough, how this tall skinny kid got to be so successfül in the world of lightning fast 300 pounders trying to take his head off can teach me and you how to be successful at just about anything.
He said, "I didn't win this [Sportsman] award being Tom Brady the person. I won it because of the way we play football. Notice he said the way "we" play football.
He now has choices in life that most people will only ever dream about... Because he is good at doing just one thing.
The consummate team player. He "just wanted the camaraderie, to share some memories with so many other guys."
Purpose.
"I love seeing us get better," he says, "and I don't think you get better in games. The improvement comes in practice."
That is true of everything you will ever do.
When he was in high school, he and the other quarterbacks would practice a drill they called The 5 Dots. With marks on the ground, they would practice the same steps over and over and over.
Every morning before school he worked on it in his backyard.
Repetition.
Practice.
So now at just 28, he's won 3 Super Bowls, makes tens of milliöns of döllars, does what he loves doing, has a wonderful future ahead of him... And it is all because he's willing, on his own, to do the boring repetition. And loves it.
No one will ever teach you any method of changing how to succeed at anything, how to change any habit, how to develop mastery, how to quit feeling some way and start feeling another way without incredible repetition of thought.
It is impossible without it.
There is no magic wand.
You can try and try, but you will always fail.
Practicing is where you get good.
Mastery comes only after numerous missteps and failures.
So if you just think that you'll one day be able to start eating healthy after being a junk food junkie for decades and sücceed your first time out, guess again. You won't.
Sales süccess means lots of failures before you get good.
Being happy even requires practice. Imagine that.
Walking required practice.
Talking, too.
Eating even.
Remember, you used to get food all over you when you ate. Now that you are older, hopefully you're a little neater!
So when I hear people tell me every day, "I tried everything to [change something about themselves]." I know that they are not into practice.
They want a "pill."
But think about any person who is super süccessful in some area of life. They are good at something because of repetition of thought. Purpose. Drive. Focus. Practice.
It's not unfair.
It's life.
No action is possible without thoughts behind the actions. Lots of the same thoughts.
Probably for years and even decades.
If you are trying to make changes without doing the necessary practice (of the right thoughts, which creates new attitudes and beliefs), then you will always be disappointed. Decide now to "get it," to understand the logic here.
Mike Brescia
Back to MAIN
On the cover of this week's Sports Illustrated is Tom Brady, 2005's Sportsman of the Year.
What makes this article interesting to me is how they gave us a glimpse into the mind of the most süccessful player at the most difficult position in the last 20 years. You see, it's important to me to know how people become successfül at anything. I look for mental patterns that can be
translated into any other area of life.
To know how Tom got so good so young, so mentally tough, how this tall skinny kid got to be so successfül in the world of lightning fast 300 pounders trying to take his head off can teach me and you how to be successful at just about anything.
He said, "I didn't win this [Sportsman] award being Tom Brady the person. I won it because of the way we play football. Notice he said the way "we" play football.
He now has choices in life that most people will only ever dream about... Because he is good at doing just one thing.
The consummate team player. He "just wanted the camaraderie, to share some memories with so many other guys."
Purpose.
"I love seeing us get better," he says, "and I don't think you get better in games. The improvement comes in practice."
That is true of everything you will ever do.
When he was in high school, he and the other quarterbacks would practice a drill they called The 5 Dots. With marks on the ground, they would practice the same steps over and over and over.
Every morning before school he worked on it in his backyard.
Repetition.
Practice.
So now at just 28, he's won 3 Super Bowls, makes tens of milliöns of döllars, does what he loves doing, has a wonderful future ahead of him... And it is all because he's willing, on his own, to do the boring repetition. And loves it.
No one will ever teach you any method of changing how to succeed at anything, how to change any habit, how to develop mastery, how to quit feeling some way and start feeling another way without incredible repetition of thought.
It is impossible without it.
There is no magic wand.
You can try and try, but you will always fail.
Practicing is where you get good.
Mastery comes only after numerous missteps and failures.
So if you just think that you'll one day be able to start eating healthy after being a junk food junkie for decades and sücceed your first time out, guess again. You won't.
Sales süccess means lots of failures before you get good.
Being happy even requires practice. Imagine that.
Walking required practice.
Talking, too.
Eating even.
Remember, you used to get food all over you when you ate. Now that you are older, hopefully you're a little neater!
So when I hear people tell me every day, "I tried everything to [change something about themselves]." I know that they are not into practice.
They want a "pill."
But think about any person who is super süccessful in some area of life. They are good at something because of repetition of thought. Purpose. Drive. Focus. Practice.
It's not unfair.
It's life.
No action is possible without thoughts behind the actions. Lots of the same thoughts.
Probably for years and even decades.
If you are trying to make changes without doing the necessary practice (of the right thoughts, which creates new attitudes and beliefs), then you will always be disappointed. Decide now to "get it," to understand the logic here.
Mike Brescia
Back to MAIN
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Gratitude
"He who would be blest, let him scatter blessings." – Above Life's Turmoil
James Allen wrote this line to make his point about sowing and reaping. I’m going to use the line to make a point about the power of giving thanks, of having an “attitude of gratitude.”
The Bible, Talmud and all the great world religions include the power of gratitude in their teachings. In the Koran it is written that “If you are grateful, I will give you more.”
Indeed, sometimes it’s pretty amazing the way the universe rewards those who are grateful. It’s almost as if the Creator says “he’s thankful for what he has, let’s give him some more.”
And the opposite can also appear to be true. As if the Creator says “he’s unhappy with what he has now, so let’s not give him any more.” Sincere gratitude seems to unlock abundance in our lives.
Numerous scientific studies indicate people who are thankful for what they have are happier, have better relationships and enjoy better health --- the only reasons you need to have an attitude of gratitude.
But there are practical reasons too. In one study the participants who had been in the gratitude condition reported having made more progress toward their goals.
Americans gather this week to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday but this message is for those of all nationalities. Gratitude and Thanksgiving aren’t just once a year or even once a month things. Spending time each day giving thanks for the blessings in your life (and everyone has blessings they can count) is a great habit to develop.
Jeff Keller, author of Attitude is Everything, says, “It costs you nothing to be grateful and appreciative, yet it has a considerable impact on the quality of your life. So, don't waste another minute. Every day, reflect on the priceless gifts you've been enjoying. Openly share your gratitude with others. And, the next time somebody asks if anything great happened to you today, you'll have plenty to say!”
And that’s worth thinking about.
Back to Main
.
.
James Allen wrote this line to make his point about sowing and reaping. I’m going to use the line to make a point about the power of giving thanks, of having an “attitude of gratitude.”
The Bible, Talmud and all the great world religions include the power of gratitude in their teachings. In the Koran it is written that “If you are grateful, I will give you more.”
Indeed, sometimes it’s pretty amazing the way the universe rewards those who are grateful. It’s almost as if the Creator says “he’s thankful for what he has, let’s give him some more.”
And the opposite can also appear to be true. As if the Creator says “he’s unhappy with what he has now, so let’s not give him any more.” Sincere gratitude seems to unlock abundance in our lives.
Numerous scientific studies indicate people who are thankful for what they have are happier, have better relationships and enjoy better health --- the only reasons you need to have an attitude of gratitude.
But there are practical reasons too. In one study the participants who had been in the gratitude condition reported having made more progress toward their goals.
Americans gather this week to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday but this message is for those of all nationalities. Gratitude and Thanksgiving aren’t just once a year or even once a month things. Spending time each day giving thanks for the blessings in your life (and everyone has blessings they can count) is a great habit to develop.
Jeff Keller, author of Attitude is Everything, says, “It costs you nothing to be grateful and appreciative, yet it has a considerable impact on the quality of your life. So, don't waste another minute. Every day, reflect on the priceless gifts you've been enjoying. Openly share your gratitude with others. And, the next time somebody asks if anything great happened to you today, you'll have plenty to say!”
And that’s worth thinking about.
Back to Main
.
.
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